Monday, March 22, 2010

Keeping composed

In the past couple of weeks, I have found I have not been able to keep myself composed when someone asks about the current status/schedule. It is a common occurrence now for Eric to look at me and say, "What's wrong?" I have moments where I just tear up....or snot up in my case. I guess I must look teary even though I don't have tears that run across my cheeks anymore. That is not because I have cried so much I am out of tears. It is because Sjogren's has caused my tears to decrease. But I really wish my snot would dry up because now when I cry it all runs out my nose. Anyway, I guess I'm not sure how I am supposed to be.  We were in Lowes last Sunday looking for tile and pricing a new front door when I found myself "tearing up".  We love to do those things together. And we enjoy putzing around together.  I will miss that time with him very much.   Today in church I glanced at my sons during the Our Father and we were all holding hands and I started "tearing up" again.  Eric was at drill all weekend so he was not with us in church. We miss him very much when he is not there. But we are sticking together as a family through this and Christ's presence is very evident to me through my sons and how they are treating one another as we all prepare for the coming year.

We have been practicing Skyping and playing Scrabble online at the same time.  Eric and I love to play Scrabble and we found an online version on facebook.  So it is possible we might be able to stay connected by doing that one thing while he is overseas.  For now I sit in my bed and he sits downstairs and we kind of pretend what it will be like.  It is all in good fun and is giving us some laughs, too;  especially so when the boys realize we are talking to each other in the same house.  But most importantly we have everything set up and ready with our computers.  And no matter what I won't give up my competitive nature and will try to beat him wherever he is!

Next month I will attend a family support meeting to learn more.  Being apart in this kind of a situation is quite a balancing act.  Eric and I will have to find our own niche and figure out what is acceptable for us for our situation.  We will have to learn what to share about our daily lives and still stay as connected as possible without creating unnecessary stress for one another as we go through the year.

So today I find much comfort in this verse...

Colossians 3:15-17
And let the peace of Christ control your hearts, the peace into which you were also called in one body.  And be thankful.  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, as in all wisdom you teach and admonish one another, singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.  And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

So keep asking both of us. Eric has interesting thing to share. I will do my best to hold my composure.  All hugs and well-wishes accepted!  Thank you to everyone for your support!

Prayer requests:
1) Pray Monica has an easy transition as she takes over the budget and bill-paying.
2) Pray for stamina and health for Eric as he goes through physical training to prepare.
3) Pray for Eric to continue to make connections and bonds with his team.
4) Pray we make all the right and necessary car decisions in the next couple of months.
5) Praise for no snow and warmer temps!!

God Bless,
Monica

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